Faith In Plain Sight

Finding a measure of faith in the everyday.



Loosing Control

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I don’t write about parenting or even mention my kids very much because I don’t feel like that’s an area I can speak to with any effectiveness really. For the past 8 1/2 years I have kind of felt like parenting took a skill set I just don’t possess. It just doesn’t come easily to me. I always found that funny because all I wanted when I was younger was to be a wife and a stay at home mom.  I feel like I am fairly awful in both of those areas.

I have never really been a go with the flow kind of girl.  I almost always get irritated when something messes up my plans for the day, whether I actually have plans or not.  It just wrecks my mood for hours if not the whole day.  My selfish nature plays a part in that I am sure.

Today I got a call from the school that my youngest was throwing up and needed to be picked up.  When I got him home he seemed just fine.  Running around chasing the dog and acting silly.  About three hours later our day took a serious left turn as he started simultaneously throwing up and having explosive diarrhea.  Let me tell you how that can ruin a day and would have had me in a stress induced panic a year ago, ok, maybe make that six months ago.  Today however I just calmly leaped into action.  Cleaning the toilet in between episodes, drawing a bath with an oatmeal concoction in it to calm him down, because what kid doesn’t love the bath tub.  By this time he was bawling because everything hurt.  While he was in the bath I unclogged the vacuum where someone had left a necklace on the floor and it got sucked up the day before stopping the vacuum dead in it’s tracks.  I had to stop vacuuming to apply lotion to his little back and then finish vacuuming under a disapproving stare because he couldn’t hear the tv.  Then he was on the couch watching tv and complaining because he was hungry and didn’t like the choice of toast, crackers or chicken noodle soup I had given him.

Today, a day that would have completely derailed me before, I handled without missing a beat.  Days like these happen and that is what mommy is here for right?  For a little while I felt like super mom.  I kind of feel like that maternal instinct I was sure I didn’t have has started to immerge from wherever inside of me that it has been hiding all these years.  Maybe I’m not so terrible at this after all.

Today wasn’t so much about the events that took place as it was about the change I noticed in myself.  I realized that my parenting was that one area I was trying to hang onto all the control, even in the midst of all the changes I’ve been going through these last few months.  Because I have to be able to handle something on my own right?  Not so much as it turns out.  The only way to truly win is to let go of all control.  In every area.  I know it can be scary, but who do you think is better equipped to deal with all the things life has to throw at you, you or God?  My bet is on God every time.  Without Him I absolutely do not have the skill set it takes to parent effectively, or to handle any other area of my life really.  At some point I must have let go of the control, or I was too tired today to try to hold onto it.  Either way, today went smoother than any day like it has gone before.

When I let God in just a little bit, He can deal with the storm that is raging inside of me, then giving me the strength and skills to deal with the storm that is raging all around me. @mollieh02

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Happy Thanksgiving week to everyone!  I hope you all have a great week with family and friends.  My babies leave tomorrow to go out of town to visit family with their dad.  So it will be me the cat and dog until Sunday.  I will of course have lunch with family on Thursday, but that is the extent of my plans for the week.  I’m just gonna see what pops up.  Love to you all!  Be safe as you travel this week.

 

Godspeed,

Mollie  <3

 

 

 

 

Strength Renewed

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Today my strength betrayed me.  Luckily it waited until I was safely alone in my car on the drive home from church before it flung the flood gates wide open.  It came completely without warning.  I walked out of church feeling upbeat, chipper even.  I had a moment of pause when I couldn’t find my car in the parking lot, but I was happy.  But then my carefully maintained strength faltered.  It took me a good while to get it back under control.

What do you do when your strength falters?  Me?  I called on my online Bible study group and asked to borrow some of their strength.  I could almost feel their prayers covering me.  Then I took to distracting myself.  I swept and mopped the floors.  Emptied the trash and litter box.  Finished the dishes and washed the cat and dog bowls and the mats they sit on in my kitchen.  I did the last with my monster puppy sitting at my feet keeping careful watch over me handling his things.  He’s a crazy dog!  Slowly I felt my strength being renewed.

It’s for these moments that God gives us community.  Our community can be strong for us when we are weak.

Tonight my heart is content and there is now less on my housework to do list for the week.  All in all, even with my moments of weakness, it was a good day.

Now for your daily dose of cuteness, and something that makes my heart happy, I give you my two boys playing tug of war with our puppy, Norris, and his favorite toy.  Yes the purple monkey belongs to the dog.  My mother bought it for him, and no one else is allowed to touch it if you ask him.  LOL!

purple-monkey

 

Godspeed,

Mollie  <3

I am linking up over at Fresh Market Friday.  Click this link to learn more and join in!

Enjoy {Five Minute Friday}

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I have always seen singleness as a burden of sorts.  I have often found it hard to be content during single seasons.  But it’s during these times when I feel like I’m waiting for something more to happen in my life that God imparts wisdom to me and cements in me the lessons He wants me to carry into the next seasons of my life.  It’s during one of these seasons that He told me I am a writer.  That He introduced me to the people who would become my biggest supporters, not just in writing, but as I walk through life in general.  And during this particular season of singleness He has been teaching me to focus in more on Him.  It is during this season, which I am really hoping is my last single season, that He is teaching me to walk by His side more completely.

So, even during these seasons that I sometimes feel are burdens I am trying to enjoy the time I have.  Last night I went on a one-on-one date with my oldest son to our town’s bed race.  Yes, you read that right and yes it is exactly what it sounds like.  In the grand tradition of small towns mine has it’s own character.  Only in my town do we celebrate the coming holiday season by racing beds on wheels through the middle of town!  It’s really kind of funny to watch!  Then it was home for pizza and hot chocolate with both my babies!

Let God fill you with all the tools you will need for the coming seasons of life and enjoy the time you have during the season you are walking through right now!
Godspeed,

Mollie <3

 

This post is part of the Five Minute Friday link-up. FMF is where bloggers gather together to form a writing flash mob where we all write on a one word prompt for 5 minutes with no editing! Sound like fun? You can learn more by clicking on the button below and/or join this week’s link-up here!

Common {Five Minute Friday}

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I have often wished there was a cure for the common life while growing up.  It wasn’t until I grew up and met Jesus that I learned that there is exactly one cure for the common life.  You have to bury yourself so far inside the heart of God that the common world can’t find you there because they have no access to it.

The life I live is not common.  It is extraordinary!  Think about it.  I get to walk through my days talking to the God who created the entire world whenever I want.  I get to lift my eyes to the Heavens and draw on His wisdom.  I get to open this book that is full of love letters He wrote just for me and learn more about His heart every day.  I get to walk out a purpose in my life that was ordained by God Almighty Himself.  I don’t have all the answers, but I know enough to get through this one day and still be walking towards Him instead of away from Him when the day is done.  That is the key to the uncommon life.  Walking towards God, always.

There is one simple step to start this extraordinary life.  Accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior.  Confess your sins and invite Jesus to live in your heart.  Then give up the wheel and let Him steer for awhile.  The road may be bumpy at times, but it will always be worth it when you are riding with Jesus.

 

 

Godspeed,

Mollie <3

 

This post is part of the Five Minute Friday link-up. FMF is where bloggers gather together to form a writing flash mob where we all write on a one word prompt for 5 minutes with no editing! Sound like fun? You can learn more by clicking on the button below and/or join this week’s link-up here!

Little Reminders Of Who I Am

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I am beautiful….I know because someone messaged me, “Good morning beautiful” this morning.

I am loved….I know because two little pairs of arms wrapped around my neck and “I Love You Mommy” was whispered in my ear, as I was laying in each of their beds praying over them tonight.

There are so many little ways that God reminds me who I am to Him.  These reminders are sprinkled all throughout my days.  They are in the kind words of strangers.  In the actions of the people who make up my daily life.  In the whispered promises He speaks to my heart.  These reminders come just when I need them.  Just when I’m starting to doubt who I am and what my worth is.  It’s then, in my weakest moments, that the reminders come.  He often speaks His words of truth into my heart when I can’t get away to write them down.  When I am in the shower, driving down the road, when I’m in the middle of serving at church or volunteering at my kids’ school.  It’s then that He speaks to me so that I am forced to remember.  To take in those reminders of who I am and make them a part of me.  Making them harder to forget the next time doubt tries to creep in.

I am blessed….

I am everything I need to be for this exact moment in time….

I am a work in progress….

I am His, and that is the one thing I really need to know.  The most important thing I need to know.  Everything else that I am stems from that one fact.  I am His.

Do you know who you are?  How do you know?  When does God whisper His words of truth into your heart?

 

Godspeed,

Mollie  <3

Journey {Five Minute Friday}

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There is joy in the journey.  Life is made up of many little journeys.  You can find joy in each and every one of them.  Sometimes the joy is evident and comes in like a flood.  Other times, other journeys are made up of pain and misery.  Even still sometimes an unexplainable joy creeps in.  Unspeakable joy I call it.  It’s in those moments that God whispers to a weary heart.  It’s in those moments that He banishes the weight of the world for just a little while.  There is joy in the journey.  Sometimes it is easy to find.  Other times it is only in looking back that you can clearly see it.  Sometimes you have to reach the end of a journey before you can take a look back and see the

Joy can take on many different forms.  A moment that creates deep belly laughter.  Discovering just a little more of God’s purpose for your life, or behind a situation you didn’t understand.  There is even joy in lessons learned.  So, when you face trials of many kinds count it all joy (James 1:2) my friend.  There is joy in EVERY JOURNEY.

 

Godspeed,

Mollie <3

 

This post is part of the Five Minute Friday link-up. FMF is where bloggers gather together to form a writing flash mob where we all write on a one word prompt for 5 minutes with no editing! Sound like fun? You can learn more by clicking on the button below and/or join this week’s link-up here!

 

 

 

A Letter To The Man Who Broke My Heart

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Hi.

I have written and rewritten this letter over and over again. Erased it all and started fresh.  I could write a thousand things on this page.  In the end the only thing that feels important enough to put in this space is this:

You broke my heart into a thousand pieces.  Thank you.  You were right.  We were headed down a dangerous road that probably would have seen us divorced in the end.  We needed some time apart.  We needed a reset.  Now we’ve had one.

Thank you for being the catalyst I needed to inspire me to change.  Loosing you pushed me right into the arms of the Father.  Forced me to take a good long hard look at who I am and compare that to who I want to be.  To who God made me to be.  I think I’m making strides in the right direction.

I still feel like we got gypped somehow.  We waited all that time to be together.  And a year was all we got?  Seems like we should have had longer.  I want you to be happy.  Truly I do.  I promise you that I still pray for you daily and will continue to do so.  I feel like the last chapter in our story hasn’t been written yet.  Someday we will find our way back to being friends.  That is after all where we started.

 

Always,

Mollie

P.S. I Love You

Some sunflowers to end this series with just because they make me happy!  Every long journey should end with something that makes you smile!

photo credit: michaelmueller410 red sun 2 via photopin (license)

photo credit: michaelmueller410 red sun 2 via photopin (license)

photo credit: pieterww (cybershot) GammaR049 via photopin (license)

photo credit: pieterww (cybershot) GammaR049 via photopin (license)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Only God can heal a broken heart, but there are things we can do to help foster self healing. This post is part of my series 31 Days of Self Healing. You can find the rest of the posts for this series here.

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To The Broken Hearted

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Dear Friend,

I am so very sorry that you are having to walk down this road.  I wish I had some words to say or advice to give that would hurry the pain away for you.  I am afraid that you just have to be in it for awhile to get to the other side of it.  The greatest advice I can give you is to press hard into God.  He is the only one who can truly heal your heart.  The Bible and prayer are the gifts He has given you so that you can reach Him when you need Him.  I can’t tell you what your journey to healing will look like, or how long it will take.  I can tell you my own story of healing and hope that you find some hope and some solace in it.

It has been just over five months since my fiancé walked away from me.  In the beginning we tried to be friends, which kept the pain fresh.  I kept thinking at any moment he would come back to me, but he didn’t.  I cried a lot and everywhere I went.  I am pretty sure I have been dehydrated for the past five months.  (Be sure to drink lots of water…)  The pain was so heavy at times I felt like I wouldn’t survive it.  I was sure that I would never feel any better.  But here I stand five months later and the pain has faded.  I barely feel it at all most days.  The tears are less frequent and come more slowly.  Every now and again a rush of emotion will hit me, but it comes so much less than it did months ago.  One morning I woke up and realized I didn’t cry yesterday (the realization created an instant flow of tears, but they lasted for only a moment.)  I still miss him terribly, and every time a text comes into my phone for just a second my heart skips a beat and his name pops into my head.  It’s never him, but still every time the text notification goes off I have that feeling.  Sometimes I look up from where I sit typing at the kitchen table and half expect to see his face peering at me through the windows in the top of my front door.  While the feelings haven’t faded away yet, the tears and the pain have faded.  I fully expect that eventually all of the feelings will fade away as well.  That is a rough estimation of my story so far.

Let me give you one piece of wisdom I have picked up during this.  I have wanted my ex back this whole time.  Maybe that’s where you are too?  Even if you someday get back together with your ex, you have to heal from this heartache first.  I can’t imagine that getting back together with an unhealed heartbreak would yield good results.  The feelings of being broken hearted are raw and unreasonable.  Taking those emotions into a fresh start would only spell disaster and I’m afraid you would find yourself right back here eventually.  You have to deal with all of your emotions and feelings before you can start again with your ex or with someone new.  I for one am glad that I had the time I needed to deal with my feelings.  If my ex had come back to me like I wanted him too, I really think things would have gone terribly wrong for us simply because my heart was still hurting.  You have to give yourself time to heal from the heartbreak.

Remember, this is just a transition period.  It won’t last forever.  I promise, the pain will fade, the tears will stop, and you will feel better again.  If there is anything I can do to help you on this road please don’t hesitate to ask.  You can leave me a comment below or message me on my Facebook page.  If you need someone to talk to outside of your world I encourage you to check out my resources page.  I personally know each of those agencies and highly recommend them.

 

 

Godspeed,
Mollie <3

Only God can heal a broken heart, but there are things we can do to help foster self healing. This post is part of my series 31 Days of Self Healing. You can find the rest of the posts for this series here.

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Find What Works For You

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The road to healing is a personal one.  My road may look completely different than yours.  You may have to try a few things before you find the right tools for your journey.

The things listed on these pages are the path that God led me down.  They are the things I needed to do in order to heal and be set up to continue down the road He has set before me.  Some of them may work for you, or none of them.  I have found that the key to aiding in your own healing is in keeping busy and eliminating the things from your daily world that pull you back into the pain.  Talking always helped me.  If you feel like you don’t have anyone in your life that you feel comfortable talking to about your broken heart I encourage you to check out my resources page.  I personally recommend all of the resources on that page.

There are so many things that might help you on this journey to healing.  You don’t have to follow my road.  Feel free to use the ones you like and ignore the others.  Find what works for you.

Here are just a few more suggestions:

  • Do something you have always wanted to do.
  • Start a project.  (Anyone want to come train my puppy?  He likes to jump.)
  • Learn something new.  (I have always wanted to learn sign language.)
  • Take a trip. (I dream of visiting Scotland and Ireland, and the sunflower fields of Italy.)
  • If all else fails get lost in your favorite music, movies and books.

The possibilities are endless.  Go ahead and leave any suggestions you have thought of in the comments below.  Maybe your suggestions will be of help to someone else who is on the same journey.

 

Godspeed,
Mollie <3

Only God can heal a broken heart, but there are things we can do to help foster self healing. This post is part of my series 31 Days of Self Healing. You can find the rest of the posts for this series here.

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Let Yourself Dream Again

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At some point something is gonna catch your eye.  There will be a glimmer of a thought of a future that you can’t fathom right now.  It will be but a moment, but it will be a sign.  A sign that healing has taken place.  A sign that sometime, maybe sooner than you thought, the idea of a future love won’t seem so daunting, so impossible a prospect.  Don’t be afraid of that moment.  Don’t chase off the thoughts that spring up from there on.  Let that one moment take root.  Let it grow.

My moment happened while I was scrolling through my Pinterest feed.  A ring caught my eye.  It was a sunflower engagement ring.  I love sunflowers!  They are one of my two favorite flowers.  There isn’t even a glimmer of a thought of another man in my head yet, but the ring…  I love that sunflower ring, just not so much as an engagement ring.  I would totally wear it on my other hand though.  It was just a moment.  But a moment that showed proof of healing.

Being in love, married, taking care of someone else, is the deepest desire of my heart. I’ve thought of it for as far back as I can remember.  In the last months I have questioned that desire.  I have questioned the very existence of love and if anyone would ever be able to put up with me long enough to get there.  I had all but decided it was just gonna be me and my boys.  Not everybody gets married right?  I was resigned to the fact that it just isn’t in the cards for me.  I’m just not the marrying kind.  Even typing those words now has the ring of untruth, but that is where I have been for about the last month or so.  Then that ring caught my eye.  I may have even gone on to search for more engagement rings on Pinterest.  Dating still seems a very distant thought, and marriage more distant still, but there is a glimmer of a hope.  I can barely see it, but it’s there.

When that moment pops up and you catch yourself thinking of future possibilities, don’t stifle the thoughts.  Let that dream plant hope in your heart.  Let hope guide you forward.  Dreams are just promises planted in our hearts by God.  Let them grow into everything He holds in store for you.

(For those of you who are curious about the sunflower ring, you can find it on the jewelry board in my Pinterest account.)

 

Godspeed,
Mollie <3

Only God can heal a broken heart, but there are things we can do to help foster self healing. This post is part of my series 31 Days of Self Healing. You can find the rest of the posts for this series here.

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